You Can’t

Hi everyone! Thanks for checking out my first post! What you’re about to read is a lesson I learned fairly recently, but has changed my life. It can be summed up in two little words: You Can’t.

Have you ever felt stuck? Like there’s just one thing in your life that is holding you back from a whole world of blessing and opportunity from God? Yeah, me too. This “one thing” can be a number of different things. Maybe it’s anxiety; you’re too afraid or nervous to go where God’s calling you. Maybe it’s depression; you’ve got a huge rain cloud over your head and you just can’t find the strength to follow where God leads. Maybe it’s insecurity; you’re doubting your ability to fulfill the calling on your life. 

For me, it was a habitual sin. A sin in my life that I couldn’t shake. Wherever I went, whatever I did, it was always right beside me. Tempting me, taunting me, making me feel too filthy to come to God and ask for forgiveness. I found myself feeling a lot like Paul when he said: “So I find it to be a law that when I want to do right, evil lies close at hand… Wretched man that I am! Who will save me from this body of death?” (Romans 7:21). Every time I wanted to do good for God and His kingdom, every time I wanted to repent and be free, it came knocking at my door over and over again. I lived like this for six years. For six years, I lived away from the will of God, away from His forgiveness, and away from His love. I felt like I couldn’t come to Him. I felt too dirty. The guilt weighed on my conscience and I didn’t know what to do. Loneliness would creep in and drive me right back to where I started. I ran to this sin for comfort, when I should have been running far far away from it. I should’ve been running to God. I was the very definition of a hypocrite. I looked spiritually alive to everyone else. No one else could see the sin quietly destroying me. Destroying my relationship with God. I wanted to repent. Oh, how I wanted to come home. But every time I tried, I just fell back in deeper than before.

But praise God. He never left me. 

Have you ever felt God closing in? Not like He’s ambushing you, but like He’s finally said ‘enough is enough’ and He just keeps knocking at your heart until you talk to Him? That happened to me about a month ago. Everytime my mind lifted from a distraction, I felt Him knocking, telling me to talk to Him. The Holy Spirit would not let me shake this feeling. So, finally, I went into my room all alone and began to pray. I expected this prayer to be like every other. The prayers I would pray in an attempt to repent, only to fall back into my sin. But it wasn’t. I had an epiphany. A breakthrough. I finally had my ‘light-bulb’ moment. After six years of not being able to get free, I finally realized why. Every time I would try, I was trying to do it myself. I was trying to clean myself up for God. I was trying to stop sinning in my own strength, and Lord knows I have none. Then He brought Exodus 14:14 into my mind. “The LORD will fight for you. You need only to be still.”

Be still, huh? That’s it? That’s all I have to do?

Then I realized that’s all I can do. 

That’s all I’m capable of. So, that’s what I did. I stopped trying. I asked God to fight for me instead. Fight my sin. Fight my loneliness. Fight my fear. Fight for me. And praise God, He’s a promise keeper. As the next few weeks went by, something happened that I never expected. I was able to say no. Say no to the sin that use to grip me like a viper. I finally was able to stop doing what I knew didn’t please God. I was finally free. Not because of myself or any strength within me, which is none, by the way, but because I finally let God do it for me. 

You see, I had to learn the hard way that trying to fight your own battles is a lost cause. You can’t. I can’t. We can’t. We can’t do it on our own. And, truth be told, we were never meant to. When you let God fight your battles, you always see victory. Victory may look different than you expected, but He always comes through for you. Victory doesn’t always mean getting what you want. In fact, it rarely mean getting what you want. Victory means growth. Maybe a trial you went through hurt, but now you trust God in ways you never did before. I call that victory. Maybe now because you didn’t get what you thought you wanted you see how it wouldn’t have been good for you. I call that victory. If it further conforms you to the likeness of Christ, I call that victory. 

So, let God fight your battles. I promise, He’s the antidote for every pain, trial, sin, and sickness. Do you have anxiety? He’s the Prince of Peace. Do you feel broken? He makes beauty from ashes. Are you depressed? Do you feel like the darkness is overcoming you? He’s the bright and morning star. He is light and in Him there is no darkness at all. Are you lonely? He’s the great comforter who promises never to leave nor forsake you. Is there sickness? Is cancer creeping in? He’s a God of healing, and nothing is impossible for Him. Are you like me? Is there a sin in your life you just can’t seem to shake? He’s a chain-breaker. His blood has the power to set you free. Sin doesn’t stand a chance. Anxiety doesn’t stand a chance. Cancer, loneliness, and depression all bow in the presence of King Jesus. 

Let Him fight for you, He wins every time. 

So, what do we say then? I think I Corinthians 15:57 sums it up nicely. 

“But thanks be to God! Who gives us the victory through our Lord Jesus Christ.”